quand même content: 2008/08

L'Élan Vital

In the video, L'Élan Vital members are enjoying a sunny day in the park sipping "Bakardi Teezers" and chuckling when the sinister team of "Enron Execs" tries to ruin their afternoon by soaking them in Bakardi and challenging them to a barbarous game of streetball -- first to 10 wins. Sensing mortal danger yet refusing to feed the egos of such miscreants, L'Élan Vital dons the battle gear of their forefathers: sweatbands and Iron Maiden slap-bracelets, and takes the court as the heroic "Single Mothers."

The match is tight from the inception, as each shot seems to fall identically through the net. Yet, when the ferocious game of the Enron Execs comes but one point from victory, the 9-8 lead seems insurmountable for the Single Mothers. In desperation, Patriot Andy calls a timeout. Honoring the soccer tradition of their youth, the teams grab Ecto Coolers and orange slices and take a well-earned rest.

Nearing the closing seconds of the break, an angelic coach appears to the Single Mothers and describes an ingenious play with which our heroes can tie the game at 9. With enthusiasm "in the glory of the lord", the teams take the court for their final showdown. Implementing their pre-ordained play precisely, the Single Mothers baffle the Enron Execs with blazing speed and razor-sharp turns, allowing Bearded Brandon the solitary moment needed for the perfect long range jumper. Deities willing, he nails it.

Tied at 9, the teams battle like the lions and water buffalo at Kruger until Bearded Brandon and Half-Panted Josh epically collide, sending the ball careening into the sky like a celestial body spinning in silent solitude. At the apex of their reaches the pro- and antagonists seize the ball simultaneously and wrestle violently for possession like potential penguin mothers over a misplaced chic. As these two emotional leviathans stare swords at each other they are struck by the equality of their efforts and the futility of fighting the flaring passion between them any longer. They embrace; exactly like Romeo and Juliet's first kiss, except they are men.

While initially appalled, teammates from each side are eventually enlightened by the ethereal majesty of two hairy lovers finding solace in each other's saliva. In homage to world peace, the opposing teams graciously set aside their differences, grab their gargantuan supply of Bakardi Teezers and shower the heated lovers in a sugary bath of alcoholic bliss.

Sweaty, sticky, and spent the unified teams lay as their makers made them on the Church's court reminiscing on their former sins and prejudices. What blind Neanderthals they had been!

Yet after all the blood and excrement has dried and crusted, the fable was but a TV advertisement from a corporation exploiting the empathetic ethos of 2008 TV viewers. Bakardi Teezers "Makes switching teams a breeze."

text taken from Youtube

L'Élan Vital

In the video, L'Élan Vital members are enjoying a sunny day in the park sipping "Bakardi Teezers" and chuckling when the sinister team of "Enron Execs" tries to ruin their afternoon by soaking them in Bakardi and challenging them to a barbarous game of streetball -- first to 10 wins. Sensing mortal danger yet refusing to feed the egos of such miscreants, L'Élan Vital dons the battle gear of their forefathers: sweatbands and Iron Maiden slap-bracelets, and takes the court as the heroic "Single Mothers."

The match is tight from the inception, as each shot seems to fall identically through the net. Yet, when the ferocious game of the Enron Execs comes but one point from victory, the 9-8 lead seems insurmountable for the Single Mothers. In desperation, Patriot Andy calls a timeout. Honoring the soccer tradition of their youth, the teams grab Ecto Coolers and orange slices and take a well-earned rest.

Nearing the closing seconds of the break, an angelic coach appears to the Single Mothers and describes an ingenious play with which our heroes can tie the game at 9. With enthusiasm "in the glory of the lord", the teams take the court for their final showdown. Implementing their pre-ordained play precisely, the Single Mothers baffle the Enron Execs with blazing speed and razor-sharp turns, allowing Bearded Brandon the solitary moment needed for the perfect long range jumper. Deities willing, he nails it.

Tied at 9, the teams battle like the lions and water buffalo at Kruger until Bearded Brandon and Half-Panted Josh epically collide, sending the ball careening into the sky like a celestial body spinning in silent solitude. At the apex of their reaches the pro- and antagonists seize the ball simultaneously and wrestle violently for possession like potential penguin mothers over a misplaced chic. As these two emotional leviathans stare swords at each other they are struck by the equality of their efforts and the futility of fighting the flaring passion between them any longer. They embrace; exactly like Romeo and Juliet's first kiss, except they are men.

While initially appalled, teammates from each side are eventually enlightened by the ethereal majesty of two hairy lovers finding solace in each other's saliva. In homage to world peace, the opposing teams graciously set aside their differences, grab their gargantuan supply of Bakardi Teezers and shower the heated lovers in a sugary bath of alcoholic bliss.

Sweaty, sticky, and spent the unified teams lay as their makers made them on the Church's court reminiscing on their former sins and prejudices. What blind Neanderthals they had been!

Yet after all the blood and excrement has dried and crusted, the fable was but a TV advertisement from a corporation exploiting the empathetic ethos of 2008 TV viewers. Bakardi Teezers "Makes switching teams a breeze."

text taken from Youtube